Racewalking?! Really???

 

As I’m sure most of you are aware, the Games of the XXX Olympiad (better known as the London Olympics) officially kicked off last Friday. One thing I haven’t been able to get over, despite my growing affinity to different forms of athletic competition, is the amount of events considered worthy of the Olympics that… well, they just don’t matter.

It is very easy, in this day and time, to be considered a ‘hater’ for not giving just due to a person or group of people that are finding success for doing something you are not or for something that anyone is capable of doing. Just look at reality television, mainstream music, and today’s job market. I’ve often been assigned this ‘hater’ title, or the title of ‘pessimist’, because I share these views; however, I’d like to think of myself as more of a realist (as I’m sure most pessimists do. Ha ha.).

Regardless of the label I wear, there are very few things in life that have a solid argument from the majority. In other words, some stuff is just plain wack, yo. As far as acting or entertainment, think Kim Kardashian. Or Paris Hilton, for those old enough to remember The Simple Life… when it comes to music, consider Waka Flocka or Ke$ha (yes, that dollar sign is placed correctly). Now I’m not saying that we, as humans, don’t have guilty pleasures; Lord knows I love me some Nickelback. But this doesn’t absolve the fact that something is wack. In fact, wackness is all around you… it’s an epidemic. You may just be numb to it… and that is why us realists exist.

I’ve been more dialed in to these Olympics than I can ever remember. Maybe it’s because of the timing in my life (23, fresh and free), maybe it’s because I sit at home bored contemplating the cardboard-sign-on-the-street-corner hustle, or maybe just because my interest in competition has spiked like never before. Whatever the case may be, I’ve been more willing to give every single event a fair shake at entertaining me for the next fortnight.

With six channels of NBC-family coverage, DVR and nothing but free time, I’ve pretty much caught every memorable moment thus far that has been televised. But after viewing some of these events and listening to the radio this morning, I’ve been made aware of way too many items that need to be permanently shelved, especially in lieu of baseball and softball’s exclusion from this year’s Games.

Here’s a list of what I’ve gathered so far. You can attain Olympic gold for:

  • Beach Volleyball
  • Archery
  • Men’s Field Hockey
  • Steeplechase (humans!)
  • Racewalking
  • Synchronized Swimming
  • Trampoline

Let that settle for a minute. Granted, all of these required a unique level of skill and technique, but really? The Olympics? The grandest stage of international competition, and all you have to do is be able to shuffle your feet faster than the rest of the world?

Maybe I’m alone, but I surely find it hard to process that sports such as these qualify… especially considering missing sports as baseball, softball, golf, even cricket. What do you think?

Brennon Keys is a former sports writer for the Pine Bluff Commericial. When he isn’t busy pulling his hair out, he works as a freelancer in St. Louis, Missouri.

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